if

today
if i were one, i would wake up late every day
if i were two, i would enjoy the freedoms of pre school
if i were three, i would eat more of that delicious porridge

if i were nine, i wouldn't fear the first boy that stood on the other side of the court
if i were ten, i wouldn't be embarrassed about wearing colour clothes on my birthday
if i were eleven, i wouldn't ignore the algebra teacher

if i were thirteen, i would talk to paati the last time that she called
if i were fourteen, i would value some friendships more
if i were fifteen, i would make more of my first trip away

if i were eighteen, i wouldn't stop training
if i were nineteen, i wouldn't skip that exam
if i were twenty, i wouldn't feel pressured

if i were twenty four, i would be stronger
if i were twenty five, i would work a little lesser
if i were twenty six, i would travel much more

if i were thirty, i wouldn't want that watch
if i were thirty one, i wouldn't blame myself
if i were thirty two, i wouldn't have agreed

if i were thirty five, i would be as bold
if i were thirty six, i would be more calm
if i were thirty seven, i would do and be the same

if i were thirty eight, oh that is what i am
so what would i do
and what would i not
i can only say in a matter of time
until then i'll remember and i'll write
verse or paragraph
it doesn't matter
only thoughts and memories do