Wedding wows

South Indian (rather Tam Bram) weddings are mostly quite boring...the actual wedding ceremonies, anyway. The rest of it - the guests, the food, the outfits and jewelry, the gifts and the drama make up for the boredom in many ways.

Guests

Most often, the guest list i filled with people that the bride and groom don't know. So introductions during the ceremony are mandatory. What makes this horribly painful is that the couple is presented with boring facts about how the guest is known to whichever family member invited them. And to top it off, it usually ends with the guest telling either the bride or groom "I saw you when you were x years old...do you remember me?" !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Food

This is the most interesting part of the wedding, especially for people like me who really don't care about all the dressing up and the socializing. Yelai saapadu filled with items including vadai, payasam, a host of other sweets and savouries make any wedding bearable. What is very interesting is that close family and friends, who are fortunate enough to get a personal face-to-face invitation routinely ask who the cook for the wedding is! Like it matters really! I mean, if it's someone who isn't that great, will they not attend the wedding? Seriously! And it's a given that people will ask...so better be ready with a good enough answer in case you're not the kind to want to disclose such information.

Outfits and Jewelry

The majority of people who attend weddings like this part the best! It's a great time to show off all the finery that they possess. What's funny is that some people end up looking grander than the bride herself! Talk about stealing someone's thunder! What I love the most is the after wedding conversation between friends/family. "Did you see what she was wearing? It must have cost a bomb!" or "How could she have worn that choker? It didn't go with the sari at all!" I have an answer for such types of questions..."I didn't notice at all"! :)

Gifts

One wouldn't think that something as nice as gifts could be a talked-about topic...but it is! Mostly because other than the cash and gift vouchers that the couple get, the rest of the stuff is rubbish! Clocks - 10, Flasks - 7, Wall hangings (not coordinated) - 4, Paintings - 20. Gift registries are the need of the hour...much more than cricket wins in test matches!

Drama

It's hard to classify what actually goes into this category. It's like a pot-pourri of things...or events...that lead up to the wedding, or happen at the wedding, or even just after. There's the usual family squabbles about absolutely unimportant stuff, out-of-town relatives reaching the wedding hall even before the bride and groom have entered, the groom forgetting his belt and realizing just before the reception, kids feeling sleepy at inopportune moments, the kitchen running out of sambar...the list is endless.

On reading all this, it seems like weddings aren't so bad after all...even Tam Bram ones...right?

:)

Celebrating good times - the Social Horror's take

Weddings and other family functions are a two-edged sword. Lots of fun but lots of socializing too. Social gatherings are fun but also get a little tiring after some time...the clothes, the food, the chit chat and the rest of the gossip. But if you take away all the 'in your face' aspects, these gatherings make for an interesting experience.

These are 'her' experiences...the social horror's I mean. And any coincidence to anyone you might know of is purely coincidental...really!

The Social Horror and Jewelry

She's never been a fan of jewelry and related accessories. Ironically though, she always found herself caught in the thick of conversations about it. Questions about what stone it is, whether it's set in gold, who made it, which store it came from, how much it cost were always thrown at her. Not one to get caught without having a retort, these situations were hard for her as she never had a good-enough answer...almost all the time. So she took the easy way out - ask amma!

The Social Horror and Beauty

You've become so fair! Your complexion is lovely! Your skin is glowing! As much as these sound like fantastic compliments, the social horror found that there was actually a hidden question in them which she was expected to answer voluntarily - what have you done to yourself? What cream have you been using? Which parlor have you gone to? Again, not one to spend much time in parlors, not having a suitable answer to these questions only made her look a bit suspect...like she didn't want to share her secret beauty tips! Use kadala maavu on your face - her planned retort for the next time!

The Social Horror and Clothes

I love your salwar! What material is it? Who designed it? Who stitched it? The answer raced through her mind even before the questions were asked...I have no idea! Whoever stitched it is the person who said they will give it to me the soonest, really that's it. Really! I'm not lying! No, it's not that I don't want to give you the name...hang on, let me find the bill!

The Social Horror and Music/Dance

She was good at music but not good at dance. Did that mean that she had to sing every time there was an occasion? Did it? Dodging requests with excuses like bad throat, out of practice and so on she mostly escaped but had to put in considerable effort to come up with 'good-enough' excuses. Dancing, on the other hand, was never a part of boring Tam-Bram wedding customs, so she was spared. The 'two left feet syndrome' yet unexplored...in a 'high-free' setting anyway!

The Social Horror and Mehendi :)

She did not like mehendi...the smell, the awful color when it started to fade...everything! But as an important part of the wedding she was about to take part it, she just HAD to get it. After some dodging and time-delaying tactics (gone wrong), she got a wee bit on one of her palms. Unacceptable was the verdict! She had to get more! She was one of the important ones at the ceremony...no, she wasn't the bride but still! So what did she do? Did she get out of it or did she cave in?

To be continued...once the mehendi dries out... :)

Random...really!

After watching this match, the first thought that crossed my mind was not about the level of tennis or the fitness of the two players. It was "Will Federer text Nadal saying tough luck but great match"?

Random...but true. :)

Time

An oft written-about/ sung-about subject - time. My three all time favorites songs:

Time - Pink Floyd

Time - The Alan Parsons Project

Time Stand Still - Rush

The theme is common. That time doesn't wait for anyone. That as we get older, we get less innocent. That everyone and everything changes. That we shouldn't look back. And the most important - that we should seize the moment.

It's a pity that the meanings of these tunes don't really hit home until we are older, wiser, less innocent and more experienced.

To the circus

I went to the circus today after probably 20+ years. I felt the same excitement that I remember feeling all those years ago. It was awesome to see similar expressions on my kids' faces too!

The show was fantastic and featured all the usual acts except the animal shows. The trapeze, my favorite act, was simply superb. Such talented and hard-working artists. It's a pity that circuses are a dying trade. There isn't much money to be made after all the expenses are taken care of. Some of the acrobats are just so gifted that you wonder how they might fare under different (and obviously better) circumstances.

As a first-time adult watching the show, a few other things than the main show itself amazed me.

• The size of the tent! How much effort it probably takes to get something so big up!
• The number of support staff and the amazing coordination with which they execute their tasks.
• The acrobats level of skill. If you notice closely, the same acrobat does different events wearing different costumes. While all involve a similar skill set, they aren't exactly the same kind of moves.
• The obvious passion these artists have for their job. It's certainly not the money that keeps them going.

I wonder if circuses, as I know it today, will still be around when my children get older.

Hmmmmmmmmmm

The famous writer

She installed an application called Stat counter/ Total Pageviews on her blog about a month ago. At that time, the total 'hits' number was at 2000 something. One morning, when she was reading her past entries (writers do that, you know...it's a feel-good thing), it was at 4006.

Her first thought was "Wow, a lot of people are reading my blog"! And then, for whatever reason, she opened her blog page in another window....and the counter went to 4007!

Ah...that explained it...her few seconds of fame!

Gym room 'ones'

Have you seen:

• The one who runs many miles like a maniac but uses his feet to turn off the treadmill power switch located at a horribly low height of 1 inch from the floor?
• The one who stretches himself like elastic for a half hour but wraps up the rest of his tiring workout in 5 min?
• The one who thinks it's cool to let his sweat drip all over the cross trainer and, for greater effect, shake his hair out lest some sweat be left over?
• The one who sings along to his iPod tunes sounding like a siren but thoroughly enjoying himself?
• The one who insists on playing the radio station of his choice (without asking the rest of the gym room gang) but spends his time on the phone talking louder than the music?
• The one who has a conference call while walking at 3.5 km/hour? And still panting?
• The one who insists on carrying on a conversation with the person on the neighboring machine...who is, sort of, gasping for breath?
• The one who is watching and listening to all this and thinking "Now, that will make an interesting post"...all this while working out very hard, naturally!

Not being biased to gender or anything. 'His' just came naturally while typing.

Use 'her' wherever you like.

Same difference.

Practicing how to write

I woke up in the middle of the night and thought, 'Maybe I should write a book'! And the next thought, I mean immediately next thought, was not 'What should I write about'? but it was 'Who all will I acknowledge and thank and who will I dedicate the book to'?

Odd? Maybe. But just think about how many people have entered and exited your life with valuable and not so valuable contributions? Influences from home, school, extended family, friends, other social groups...?

So how does one weed through this seemingly endless list of people? The Pyramid of Importance - a book that tells you how to value people in your life. No, it's not yet available on Amazon or Flipkart...it's still being written. The author has a severe case of writer's block - on the Acknowledgments page.

:)

Time Capsule

Ever wondered what 10 things you would have buried in a time capsule 15 years ago?

Here's my list...

1. Audio cassettes and player
2. Walkman
3. Friendship bands with instructions on how to make them
4. Autograph/Slam books
5. First cell phone
6. Mickey and Donald comics
7. Floppy disk
8. Neon shoe laces
9. Tube of Pepsi Cola
10. Double Decker chocolate bar

I wonder what will go in my Time Capsule 15 years from now. And how I'll even record that entry.

Maybe I'll have to bury my blog, the way I know it, too.

Apartment Rules - Part Trois

I've written a couple of posts about Apartments before... read them here... 1, 2

It's been almost 2 years since I moved out of Hyderabad to Bangalore. Overall, the apartment 'scene' is far better here. Or maybe I feel that way because I'm more used to the way people function in apartments in India. Or maybe it's because the number of apartments in most complexes around where I live are a lot. But more people would mean more crazies, right? Whatever. Here's what prompted this post.

This morning, after a tiring workout at the gym, I was walking (crawling) back home. All of a sudden, I spotted something strange at a balcony above. Turned out to be a bare-chested lungi-clad neighbor standing outside and brushing his teeth...at nearly 10 a.m! I didn't know whether to be shocked about the outfit (or lack of it) or the lateness of the teeth-brushing! Either way, since I was caught off-guard, I didn't have time to look away and he caught me staring at him with a horrified expression! Thankfully, since I was close to the foyer, I quickly went inside the building.

I wonder if his eyesight is as bad as his apartments manners. What are the chances that he will recognize me when we wait for the lift or something...we are, after all, in the same block.

Yeeeeesh, wait for that post now!